i really am enjoying this motherhood thing. more and more. she is sleeping right beside me. nuzzled up against me. i can't help but smile. life has changed. i am still leslie. and that won't change. but now i am leslie with a special little someone that is my own. that i am responsible for. and that enriches my life. and for that i am super thankful.
i was not prepared for what would happen after anika was born. after we came home. let me tell you. it's been a bit of a roller coaster. but overall we are on an upward trend. we are figuring each other out. slowly. learning new things everyday. trying to read lots. talking to friends who are moms. and my sister. and my mom. and there is a lot of knowledge out there. first hand experiences. it's just a matter of taking mental notes of the tidbits that you want to try. or that you think will work for you. and then trying them. keeping some. and throwing out the ones that don't work.
p.s. i baked a spiced apple sauce cake today. for our japanese homestay student's birthday. and my friend is teaching me to crochet tomorrow. i want to say "i feel like life is getting back to normal". but there is no getting back. instead i am creating a new normal. and i like it.